Moshe Feiglin the Shabak Agent – SATIRE!
DISCLAIMER: This is a SATIRE, written by a person who
doesn’t believe it at all!
This was written as a parody of conspiracy theories and conspiracy theorists.
However, you conspiracy theorists out there who want to believe it can go right
ahead – it is parodying your extremely exaggerated willingness to believe
ridiculous things, so it would be Poetic Justice if you did believe it!
Running into my friend Mike Miller recently (for those
conspiracy theorists who take things too literally, let me clarify that I did
NOT have a traffic accident with Mike, I just met up with him 😊 ), who also appreciates sarcastic
parody, reminded me that I had been meaning to write this satire for a while
now. Therefore, I am finally writing it – enjoy!
After realizing that the vast majority of Moshe Feiglin
supporters that I know in my neighborhood are conspiracy theorists (in fact, it
seems that I can think of only 2, or maybe make that 1½, who are NOT conspiracy
theorists!), I came to the conclusion that the best parody that I could write
at this point is a conspiracy theory about Moshe Feiglin and his followers.
That is how this satiric essay was born!
So let’s begin this parody with noting that Moshe Feiglin
was born neither on the west bank nor in the USA, but rather in Haifa, which is
already suspicious! People from Haifa just never start political movements, so
there is probably some conspiracy going on to cover up where he was REALLY
born!
Also Feiglin’s father served in the Jewish Settlement Police,
in which served such notable extreme leftists as Yigal Alon and Ariel Sharon,
and which cooperated with the British mandate sometimes, which must also be
very suspicious!
Also, despite the fact that the commonly accepted enlistment
path among religiously observant Israelis is through the Hesder program, which
allows Orthodox Jewish men to pursue religious studies for a year and a half at
an approved Yeshiva, Moshe Feiglin enlisted in the Israeli army for the full
mandatory three-year term – making his membership in the Israeli Dati-Leumi
community rather suspect!
Also, Feiglin once ran a snapling company that also used
rope rappelling in the construction industry – a very suspicious occupation! In
fact, Feiglin is proven to be a disguised leftist by the Gematria relating to
this occupation. The Gematria of Snapling in Hebrew [233] and that of Glishat
Matsukim [1,029], another phrase for snapling in Hebrew, add up to 1,262; and the
Hebrew Gematria of Smolan Mitchapes [disguised leftist] is 1,249. The
difference is 13, just like the deeply unknowable 13 attributes of God – which shows
that in a hidden way, undiscernible to regular human methods of searching,
Moshe Feiglin is actually a disguised leftist! But WE have broken through the
barriers in order to protect you all from left-wing deception! Additionally,
snapling supporters generally support the slave farms on Mars, where left-wing
dictators force right-wing people to study the writings of Bernie Sanders and
Louis Farrakhan!
It is well-known that Moshe Feiglin co-founded the Zo
Artzeinu movement with Shmuel Sackett in 1993 to protest, and hopefully cancel,
the Oslo Accords, but those accords were not, in the end, cancelled by Israel,
but rather ruined by the actions of the Palestinian leadership – thus making
Feiglin a PARTNER WITH THE PALESTINIAN LEADERSHIP to undermine the Oslo
Accords!
In 2000, Moshe Feiglin and his followers in the Manhigut
Yehudit faction joined the Likud, in what seems to have been a clever move.
Feiglin declared that the only way for his ideals (which his supporters
understood to mean the ideals of extremists like Rabbi Meir Kahane) to be
attained was by working through a big party in the Israeli political system and
eventually taking over that party, and the Likud seemed to be a party within
which his group could hope to obtain influence. Indeed Feiglin’s group had some
success in Likud primaries, and in 2013, after that success, Shmuel Sackett
authored an article on the Manhigut Yehudit website rejecting calls from
supporters that he and Feiglin renounce Kahane.
However, Moshe Feiglin DID NOT author such an article, which
creates a suspicion that he may be a Trojan-horse agent working to undermine
the power of the right and to use all the votes of his supporters to actually
support the left-wing!
After all, with so many known Shabak agents masquerading as right-wing
politicians in order to destroy right-wing influence (such as, Avishai Raviv,
Oren Hazan, Yigal Amir, Yigal Bibi, Yigal Yasinov, Yigal Guetta, Yigal Yadin,
and basically anyone named “Yigal”) doesn’t it seem logical that Feiglin would
also be a Shabak agent masquerading as a right-wing politician in order to
destroy right-wing influence?
After that, Moshe Feiglin also pulled his faction out of the
Likud in January, 2015, despite impressive gains within the party, because of a
minor personal setback in the December, 2014, primaries. Feiglin then announced
that his faction would run as an independent party for the Knesset – in direct
contradiction to his entire avowed political philosophy of running ONLY as a
faction within a major party! Doing that, rather than hanging on and hoping to
improve his position the next time primaries would be held, also provides
strong indications that Moshe Feiglin must be a Shabak agent trying to
undermine the strength of the right-wing by getting so many votes into an
independent party which disguises itself as right-wing, when it will actually
support left-wing agendas in practice, as do all of the breakaway protest parties!
Now that we have proved beyond all doubt, with everything from
political truisms to Kabbalah, that Moshe Feiglin and his party are actually
left-wing entities masquerading as right-wing forces, we have AN ADDITIONAL
SPECIAL OFFER FOR YOU ALL!
AS AN ADDITIONAL BONUS, if you Share this Post with 50 other
people, and also send all of your banking information and passwords to the
Moshe Feiglin Shabak Agent Brooklyn Bridge Foundation, you will receive the $4
million prize awaiting anyone who does so!
Come on now, all you true believers, CASH IN BIG on
this great offer!
